March 14

Written by Bill Grandi on March 14th, 2019

My title for this devotion is Disillusionment vs Insight

When we are young our parents, who may be in their 30s, seem so old.  🙂 Now that I’m 66, those 30s seem so young! I admit to some nostalgia from time to time as I look back to my younger days as a pastor. I put an age out there…say 32…figure out where I was and try to picture me back then. I know. I know. Some might see it as an effort in futility but I can also see it as fun. True, there are times of disillusionment as I reflect on what I was like and what I did or did not do.

But it can also be a time of Insight. Even though I cannot change what happened and what I was like, I can see it as God’s way of moving in my life. You see, being my age affords a whole of introspection. I’ve thought about places I’ve been and things I’ve done and have decided I will not allow the disillusionment of disappointment to get me down but rather to allow the insight learned to raise me up.

Some observations:

  1. I can regret any look back and bemoan the stupidity of mistakes made and wish I had known what I was going to do and where I was going to go.
  2. I can be glad I didn’t know.  Would I have taken that ministry? Would I have regretted meeting that person? Would that decision I made change anything? Would I have ventured there if I had known how it would turn out?
  3. What lessons (insights) can I learn that will help me now; in the future; and as a mentor?


There’s something to be said about old age. I’m in the twilight of my life and of my career. I can choose to see it as a descent into an abyss or I can see it as an ascent to new heights. Disillusionment or insight…which will it be?  There’s something to be said about Proverbs 16:31 and 20:29.

“Father, thank you for the wisdom of old age. As I reflect, let my reflection not get stuck on disillusionment but let it lead to new insights.”


3 Comments so far ↓

  1. Ryan S. says:

    I enjoy an occasional reminiscing. It is important for me to not get stuck in the “what-if’s”. It is important that I look back and remember both good and bad.
    Leaning from my mistakes, celebrating my victories, and moving forward.
    Knowing God is in control and regardless of what I’ve done or where I’ve been, God will see me through to the end.

  2. When I look back on my life and consider many of the choices I made, especially if they were not the best, I try to see them as a learning experience that God used to draw me closer to Him. That certainly puts a positive spin on the past, and gives me hope for the future, no matter how old I’m getting.
    Blessings, Bill!

  3. floyd samons says:

    It’s a wise person that ponders wisdom and how to attain it. That is from our Father and revering Him brings that precious wisdom.