Forgiveness
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Thursday, October 10th, 2024
Have you ever been sitting in a chair or laying in bed and then your mind starts to wander? Not just random like a pinball, but it seems to focus in on events or circumstances of your past. Just this morning as I was praying and trying to prepare my mind and heart for my time alone with God, off it (my mind) went to the past. It focused in on failures of my past when I behaved and spoke in a way that brought disrespect to the name of Christ. I almost started replaying scenarios when suddenly God’s Spirit intervened and said, “No! Not now! That’s forgiven.”
Then I read about Abraham, God’s chosen man to be the father of the Jewish people. In Romans 4 Paul uses Abraham as an example of faith. In protest we might say, “Yeah. Some example of faith he was. He failed to believe God’s promise and wait, and now we have the Arab people as a result of his tryst with Hagar, Sarah’s handmaid.” Abraham even laughed in unbelief when told he would have a child in his old age (Gen. 17:17). What gives?
To borrow a phrase: “This is not a ‘spin job’ on Abraham’s life.” It’s not a whitewash as if Abraham never sinned, never failed, or never doubted. What it is strikes us: we get to see God’s final gracious perspective of Abraham’s life. Beyond the failure. Beyond the tragic impatience. Beyond the tragic “I’m going to take this whole matter into my own hands.” Beyond the tragic “God is taking too long.”
Then it hit me. If God could take this huge act of impatience, disobedience, i.e. sin in Abraham’s life, forgive him and bring about His purpose, surely God could do that for me. That is not excusing sin-misspeaking, wrong actions, hurt feelings, totally degrading His Name, etc.- but it does show the real magnitude of His grace. The enemy’s plan is for me to wallow in shame and humiliation. God’s plan is for me to know and experience His love and grace.
I learned a good lesson today: when Satan knocks on the door, send the Holy Spirit to answer it.
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Tags: Christian Living, Forgiveness, God, God's Plan, Grace, Jesus, Lifestyle, Ministry, Opinion, Reflection, Sin, Story
Monday, September 16th, 2024
It never ceases to amaze me when people who say they follow Christ allow petty differences to separate them. Yes, the words or actions hurt. I am not denying that but seriously? Lifelong friends becoming the rest-of-life enemies? I read the following story awhile back and used it yesterday during a communion thought:
Esther (Eppie) and Pauline Friedman were identical twins born on July 4, 1918. At age 21 they were married to their husbands in a double wedding. In 1955 Eppie took over an advice column in the Chicago Sun-Times called “Ask Ann Landers.” Only a few months later Pauline took up a similar column, “Dear Abby,” under the name Abigail Van Buren. Trouble began when Pauline offered their hometown paper, the Sioux City Journal, a lower rate for her “Dear Abby” column if the paper promised not to print her sister’s “Ask Ann Landers.” Eppie was furious. They both became very successful advice columnists, but their relationship was never the same. They counseled people on relationships, for crying out loud! Even after they both died, their children continued the feud. (copied from Feels Like Home by Lee Eclov-p.61-62)
I shake my head at that story, finding it almost unbelievable (but it’s true). Here are two advice columnists giving advice, but they can’t or won’t take their own. Hmmm. Sounds like many Christ-followers who carry grudges long past their prime. In fact, why carry a grudge at all? I tell people that “when you carry a grudge you are a slave to that other person. They own you.” They own your thoughts. They own your actions. Sometimes they even own your sleep. I will say it bluntly: it ain’t worth it.
Stop allowing past difficulties to waylay your future. Stop allowing past differences to stymie your steps. Give it up and let the offense go. Or at least, forgive from your heart. If they refuse to reciprocate, the ball is in their court and you walk free.
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Tags: Christian Living, Forgiveness, Friendship, Grudges, Lifestyle, Love, Mercy, Opinion, Reflection
Wednesday, September 11th, 2024
“NEVER FORGET!”
It’s hard to. Those words will be spoken and heard a lot today. Anyone who was alive and old enough to understand knows the significance of today. If you are like me you know where you were and what you were doing when you first heard of the well-planned, but cowardly, devastating attack on American soil. Life has never been the same and seeing the images again reminds me of watching the Twin Towers burn and then collapse. I’m also thinking of the all-too-brief days following when politicians put aside their petty gripes against each other and sang “God Bless America” on the steps of the Capitol. I’m also thinking of the few brief days/weeks when hearts became sensitive to God’s role in the founding and ongoing history of our country. I’m also thinking of when it wasn’t so much “God Bless America” but “America Bless God.” Many churches saw spikes in their attendance as people sought solace in the face of such tragedy. Sadly, it died quickly.
September 11, 2023 a double rainbow appeared in the NYC sky where the Twin Towers used to rise. The rainbow is a symbol of God’s presence and promise that He would never again destroy the earth by a flood. It is a promise from a faithful and true God.
Jesus has given us a reminder to remember Him by. Just as there will be gatherings today to honor the 3000+ souls who lost their lives 23 years ago (and since), so this memorial reminds us of the loss of life, but also the gaining of something greater. It reminds us of the ultimate sacrifice-one Man dying for the sin of the world. The perfect, sinless, Son of God, our Savior, taking the place of sinful, rebellious, unholy people to make the ultimate sacrifice to die in our place.
NEVER FORGET. 9/11. The cross of Calvary and the price paid for people (you and me) who didn’t deserve it.
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Tags: 9/11, Crucifixion, Forgiveness, God's Plan, Jesus, Opinion, Reflection, Sacrifice, Salvation, Sin, Story
Thursday, August 29th, 2024
One word says it all. One word can turn a person’s world upside down. That word? BETRAYAL.
I’m not sure there is a much more crueler word than that one. It congers up feelings of hatred, of anger, of spoken and unspoken words. It makes our blood boil. It makes us shiver.
That word came to my mind this morning as I read a passage of Scripture. Contrary to what you may be expecting, it was not about Judas’ betrayal of Jesus. In all honesty, I’m guessing most of us probably think of that when the word betrayal is mentioned.
Actually this passage is from Psalm 55. David wrote it. There were multiple times David was betrayed so I am unsure who this is speaking of, but it is still a sharp jab to David’s side. Here is the Scripture: “It is not an enemy who taunts me-I could bear that. It is not my foes who so arrogantly insult me-I could have hidden from them. Instead, it is you-my equal, my companion and close friend. What good fellowship we once enjoyed as we walked together to the house of God.” (Verses 12-14 NLT)
What do you think? You surely sense his pain. I do. Perhaps the ultimate betrayal is from a friend. We’re not talking about the man without a country who betrays his country. We are talking about a friend who betrays a friend. David describes him as “my equal, my companion and close friend.” OUCH!
How did David survive the betrayal? Not by lashing out. Not by revenge. Not my getting even. Here is his secret:“But I will call on God, and the Lord will rescue me. Morning, noon, and night I cry out in my distress, and the Lord hears my voice.” (55:16-17 NLT)
The next time you are betrayed (which I hope never happens) it’s not enough to say, “I should have chosen a better friend.” You could not have known. Rather, take your distress, your broken heart to God. You can’t change the actions or words of your former friend, but you can take charge of your reaction. Here’s some further advice from David: “I trust in God, so why should I be afraid? What can mere mortals do to me?” (Psalm 56:11 NLT)
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Tags: Betrayal, Christian Living, Forgiveness, Friendship, Lifestyle, Opinion, Reflection, Revenge, Scripture look, Story, Suffering
Wednesday, August 14th, 2024
The gift of forgiveness is one of, if not the greatest gift we can give someone…AND OURSELVES.
Many years ago I was meeting with a group of elders in a public restaurant. Another man had asked if he could join us and one of the men said Yes. After a chatty and lighthearted lunch, this man man launched into a vindictive and accusatory castigation of me and my ministry. He asked accusatory questions (not moral ones) about my time and what I did with it. (I did not answer him since it was none of his business). More questions. And then his coup de grace was telling me I should resign and move back to Ohio. Then, as was his modus operandi after a making a scene, he got up and left. I was not the only one who sat in stunned silence. I broke the ice and simple asked one question, a question that would seal what I would decide to do. I asked them if they agreed with him and did they want me to resign. “If you do,” I said, “You have my resignation today. I will not work with men who do not support me. I will not put up with such groundless accusations.” To a man they said, “No.” They all felt he was way off base and the man who approved him coming apologized never expecting that. They proved it the next meeting when he showed up (thanks to the yes from the same man who thought he was going to apologize). Instead, he came loaded for bear and made the same proposition: “Move back to Ohio where you belong.” They said after he left (again the same way), “Absolutely not.”
Several factors came into play. First, he was ticked off that his proposed building project that would have cost in the $5-600k range was rejected by the leadership. (Good thing too since factors soon took place that changed the trajectory of our direction).
Second, and more importantly, what was I going to do? You may find this hard to believe but I chose the path of forgiveness. I have seen enough lives ruined by refusing to forgive than I care to talk about. Marriages have crumbled; friendships have fallen apart never to be repaired; churches split; physical infirmities as a result of holding a grudge; all as a result of refusing to forgive.
I chose to forgive. I greeted him with outstretched hand and a smile. I asked him to help out with things (but was turned down). Why? Not because I’m a super saint. Far from it. My natural instinct was to defend myself. Instead, I tried to practice Colossians 3:12-13- “Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.” Was I perfect in it? Nope. There were times I struggled with my anger and emotions. There were times I wanted to tell others and have them defend me, i.e. boost my ego. I also knew this: the failure to forgive makes us that person’s slave. They own us. We hurt no one but ourselves when we refuse to forgive.
I have no idea how he feels, even to this day. But I know how I feel. Not vindicated. Not holier-than-thou. I do feel peace. I am not suffering from poor health from holding a grudge. And I do know Jesus stands even taller in my eyes when I read that He said, “Father, forgive them, they don’t know what they are doing.” He had it much rougher than me, that’s for sure.
What about you? Are you carrying a grudge you need to dump? Are you seeking to get even? Dump it. Excuse my French: IT. AIN’T. WORTH. IT!
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Tags: Choices, Christian Living, Forgiveness, God's Plan, God's Word, Grace, Humility, Jesus, Love, Ministry, Opinion, Reflection, Scripture look, Story
Wednesday, July 31st, 2024
I have met people who feel they are too far gone to be useful to God or for God’s work.
“Oh Pastor Bill. You don’t know how bad I’ve been. You don’t know what I’ve done. I’m too far gone and God could never forgive me for what I have done.” A similar thought is them asking me if they could be forgiven.
There’s truth and false in that statement. It is (most likely) true that I don’t know what they have done (but in the course of the conversation will probably be told). The false part of that statement is the biggest mistake of all: that he or she has done something so big and so bad that God cannot forgive.
Let me put it very clearly: NO. ONE. IS. OUT. OF. THE. REACH. OF. GOD’S. LOVE. AND. FORGIVENESS. I could repeat that statement but you get the drift. NO MATTER how far down we have gone; no matter how far out we have strayed; no matter how bad we feel we have acted; no matter how far we feel we have drifted; God’s love is greater.
The Apostle Paul put it this way: “I pray from His glorious unlimited resources He will empower you with inner strength through His Spirit. Then Christ will make His home in your hearts as you trust in Him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wise, how long, how high, and how deep His love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully.” (Eph. 3:16-19 NLT)
My emphasis whenever I read that passage is on that phrase “how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love is.” The reality is I cannot know. You cannot know. What I DO know is that His love was wide enough, long enough, high enough and deep enough until it included me.
May you know and be aware of the magnificence and reach of God’s love today.
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Tags: Christian Living, Forgiveness, God, God's Love, God's Word, Jesus, Love, Ministry, Opinion, Reflection, Scripture look, Sin, Story
Tuesday, July 23rd, 2024
Taking grace for granted can be expressed in one word: ingratitude. Let me show you what I mean:
Most people know the story of Jonah. Told to go to Ninevah (a people he hated) to preach repentance, God was going to wipe out the population if they didn’t. But Jonah knew God to be a loving God and one of grace so he ran the other way. After his encounter with the big fish, he went to Ninevah (grudgingly) and hated every minute of it. God did exactly what Jonah feared: He forgave them when they repented in sackcloth and ashes. “Don’t save them! Wipe them out!” would be Jonah’s motto. In fact, if you read Jonah 4 you find him pouting because God was merciful.
Jonah forgot God’s grace toward him. He was ungrateful.
Let’s do another scenario: A man owed a king a huge amount of money (an unpayable amount). He begs to be forgiven and the king does just that. Then this same man finds another servant who owes him a small amount and slaps the dude in jail until her can pay it off. {Side note: how is that possible if he is in jail? But I digress} The king hears about it and rescinds his gracious act of forgiveness and slaps that dude in jail. (You can find the complete story in Matthew 18:21-35)
He forgot the king’s grace toward him. He was ungrateful.
Imagine the prodigal son being received by his father, gifted with a robe, a ring, sandals, and a feast only to leave there and demand homage from another. We would probably be appalled at the callousness of that son.
Thankfully, the latter example never happened. The first two did. One in real life; the other in a parable taught by Jesus. But let’s turn it to ourselves. What if the story of our life is written? Would it be filled with stories of forgiveness followed up by forgiveness extended to others or would it have stories of God’s grace shown and then disregarded by our own ingratitude?
What say you?
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Tags: Christian Living, Forgiveness, God, Grace, Ingratitude, Jesus, Love, Mercy, Opinion, Reflection, Story
Thursday, May 30th, 2024
I cheated. I wrote this post ahead of time just in case I did not make it back home Wednesday and we decided to stay the night somewhere. Here were the thoughts I postponed from yesterday’s post to give an update on Janna.
WHAT DO YOU THINK CONSTITUTES A GOOD FAMILY?
Of course, the answers are many. Here are a few: Empathy. Sympathy. Teamwork with teammates. Honesty. Taking responsibility. Accepting responsibility. Forgiveness. Space to allow for mistakes. The freedom to make mistakes and admit them. Love (obviously). Faith. Prayers. Shared shoulders. And the list goes on.
Now…consider the church as a family. The very same characteristics of a blood family are also to be there for a different kind of blood family.
In Isaiah 1 the people of Judah were acting very “unfamily-like.” Their outward actions were blatant displays of disrespect. Yeah…that happens in real families. To put it very bluntly, their outward actions did not show the state of their heart. Or maybe they did?
How easy it is to put on a show at home and with our church family. Jesus said the religious leaders’ lips said one thing but their hearts were far from Him. It is called “going through the motions.” Family members do that. Church family members to that also. They act like they like you, but what they do and say behind your back hurts like fire.
Frankly, self-concern replaces other-concern. It destroys families. It devastates church families. Arguing and fighting, even over petty things, plays havoc on a family’s unity. It does the same for a church family.
Don’t be a “ruiner;” be a builder.
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Tags: Choices, Christian Living, Church, Family, Forgiveness, Friendship, Humility, Interactions, Leadership, Lifestyle, Ministry, Opinion, Reflection
Tuesday, May 7th, 2024
Today is “Get out and Vote!” day. Surprise! I have no interest in writing about politics. Instead, I’d like to write about something else: CLOSETS.
Closets you say? Yes. We all have them. If not, our house would be a mess of clothes strewn everywhere. We also have closets in our lives. For many of us, we want to keep them hidden and closed (preferably locked). We would prefer no one see them. Just as some closets are so crammed full of stuff that to open the door spells disaster, so it is with the closets of our lives. We have stuffed them so full of garbage that the spill would be disastrous.
The worst thing in the closet? Skeletons. Not the Halloween kind. Skeletons we want to keep buried (no pun intended) or pushed to the back so they don’t see the light of day.
And those skeletons? WOW! Adultery. An addiction to alcohol, porn, or some drug. Lying. Cheating on an exam. Murder by hatred. Plagiarism. Immorality. A loose sexual past. An abortion. The list in endless.
The sad part is that as long as that closet remains closed and unemptied, and the more we think we have fooled others, the sadder it is for us. That junk in the closet becomes a chain slowly dragging us down and holding us back.
In John 8 the Pharisees brought a woman caught in adultery (by the way, where was the man?) and threw her at Jesus’ feet. After writing in the sand and watching her accusers leave one by one, He stands and asks her where they are. After she says, “Gone,” he sets her free with a few simple words: “Neither do I condemn you. Go and sin no more.” {emphasis mine} He was not excusing her sin but He did clean out her closet and set her free.
He will do the same for us. For you. But you must unlock and open that closet door.
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i recently wrote a review of a friend’s book called Sober Cycle. It is the story of Sherry Hoppen’s battle with alcoholism. Her closet, once locked, was opened wide and exposed. You can find that review at my other blog, Cycleguy’s Spin. You can find that review here. Please visit and comment. But more, I’d encourage you to buy the book.
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Tags: Christian Living, Closet Cleaning, Forgiveness, God, Grace, Mercy, Opinion, Reflection, Story
Wednesday, April 24th, 2024
A fragile (and temporary) peace.
I read recently that on December 30, 1862 the Civil War raged. Union and Confederate troops camped 700 yards apart on opposing sides of Tennessee’s Stones River. As they warmed themselves around campfires, Union soldiers picked up their fiddles and harmonicas and began playing “Yankee Doodle.” In reply, the Confederate soldiers offered “Dixie.” Remarkably, both sides joined for a finale, playing “Home Sweet Home” in unison. Sworn enemies shared music in the dark night, glimmers of an unimaginable peace (Sort of like me playing my rock music and someone else playing country and both of us tolerating the other’s choice). 🙂 The melodic truce was short lived, however. The next morning, they set down their fiddles and picked up their rifles and when it was all said and done 24,645 soldiers died.
Reminds me of the WWII story of the German and British soldiers celebrating Christmas by laying down their weapons, sharing what they had, playing soccer together, exchanging laughs, and acting (and maybe wishing?) like the war was over. You can hear the story in this video.
Peace is fragile, as well as temporary. Try as we may, man will never be able to bring about true or permanent peace. All our treaties. All our papers. All our promises are, in reality, fragile and temporary. Treaties are made to be cast aside. Papers are torn up or burned in rebellion. Promises are broken. We see it in school/childhood friends. We see it in marriages. We see it in communities. We see it in countries. And yes, we see it in churches.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news but true, lasting peace is never found in man’s or men’s promises. And while it may last for a short period, it will never last for long. And certainly not forever. The only personal lasting peace is found in Christ, and the only true peace will be found in God’s new kingdom when Jesus returns and establishes it.
Until then…all efforts of peace are fragile and temporary. But we can still try. It begins with us! As the song says, “Let there be peace on earth and let it begin with me.”
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Tags: Christian Living, Church, Forgiveness, Friendship, Love, Mercy, Ministry, Opinion, Peace, Reflection, Story
