Kindness
...now browsing by tag
Wednesday, December 6th, 2023
When I was a young ‘un growing up, I will admit (now) that I looked forward to Christmas. I’d like to be spiritual and say that it was because of the focus on the birth of Christ, or I truly believed it was more blessed to give than to receive, but would not be telling the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I had no idea how cash-strapped my parents were; I just know it was a magical time of the year.
Part of that magic (before I knew better) was SC. No…not Scott Calvin. Santa Claus. The big guy. Part of Christmas Eve in the young Grandi household was watching an animated version of ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas (15 minutes) followed by a 15 minute retelling of the birth of Jesus. Later it was the Peanuts cartoon with Linus’ famous rendition of the Luke 2. I know…I’m really telling my age. 🙂
Anyway, SC was part of the magic. Stories abound in my head of scenes from my childhood of the ghost of Christmas past. SC is intriguing though. Little did I know, as a child, of the history and legacy of his coming to be. The person we know as Saint Nicholas (Saint Nick) was born around AD 270 to a wealthy Grecian family. Tragically, his parents died when he was a boy, and he lived with an uncle to loved him and taught him to follow God. When he was a young man, legend says that he heard of 3 sisters who didn’t have a dowry for marriage and would soon be destitute. Wanting to follow Jesus’ teaching of helping those in need, he took his inheritance and gave each sister a bag of gold coins. Over the years he gave the rest of his money away feeding the poor and caring for others. Down through time he has been honored for his generosity and held up as a standard for giving.
Sadly, many today want to rail against the commercialization of Christmas (with some merit I might add) and SC, the symbol of that commercialization. Rather than rail, let’s refocus on what he represents-giving, and in a sense, the spirit found in Matthew 25:24-40. (Please take a moment to look it up).
It is much better to give than to receive, especially when it is for and to someone less fortunate.
********************************************
Again, please let me remind you to check out my other blog (link to the right of this post) and subscribe for totally different content than this daily devotion. Thanks.
Posted in InTheShadow | 8 Responses »
Tags: Christian Living, Christmas, Compassion, Empathy, Generosity, Humility, Jesus, Kindness, Lifestyle, Mercy, Opinion, Reflection
Tuesday, November 28th, 2023
I found myself saying quite a few times this past month during my sermons that “we have been blessed to bless others.” (Sure is different than that clap-trap of the health/wealth people who bless themselves with planes, mansions, cars, etc). What has been given to us in the way of material blessings was never intended on being kept to ourselves or to enrich our lives. Being selfish is never a fun thing to see or to experience.
The same can also be said about something else: being hurt. When we are hurt-either by God (so we think) or by someone else-one of several reactions takes place: 1) we scream and shout in anger; 2) we “hole up” or withdraw within ourselves. We become almost numb to the world; or 3) we use that pain to help others. The first two are often out go-to reactions. “This pain is so deep the only person to blame is God. If not, then you, the one who caused it.” Or as I’ve mentioned, to withdraw in numbness, wondering if this pain will ever go away.
The third option is the best and preferred reaction. Instead of wallowing in anger and self-pity or misery, use this experience to help someone else. There is a saying” “Hurting people hurt people” and sadly, that is true. Childhood trauma acted out later is a perfect example of that. But let’s flip flop that:
Hurting people help people
Hurting people can turn their hurt and agony and pain and distress into empathy for others. Instead of turning inward and focusing inwardly, turn that pain outward and let your hurt minister/help someone else. Allow your life lessons-and if you are a follower of Jesus the lessons the Holy Spirit is teaching you through the Word and others-to make your heart sensitive to other hurting people.
I’ve noticed one HUGE gain from that: focusing on others-helping others-helps ease your own pain and aids in healing. If nothing else, the joy you feel from helping someone else is worth the effort. Don’t waste pain. Use pain to see another through different eyes.
***********************************************************************
On Sunday morning, Jo’s sister went to be with Jesus. She has been in a nursing facility with diabetes, kidney dialysis, and dementia which went into full bore Alzheimer’s. It was a blessing in more ways than one. We leave this morning for Sandusky, OH to meet tomorrow with the nursing home and the funeral home (all arrangements were made a couple of years ago) and the graveside committal is Thursday morning. Following the service we plan to head to Columbus, OH to see our daughter and grandson. We will be back home Friday. You can pray for safe travels and you can pray for a smooth transition for all Jo needs to take care of. I am not sure about posting any devotion over the next few days. It will depend on my availability. Thanks.
Posted in InTheShadow | 12 Responses »
Tags: Christian Living, Empathy, Grace, Helping others, Kindness, Love, Mercy, Ministry, Opinion, Outward focus, Reflection
Monday, November 27th, 2023
Have you ever noticed how easy it is to get lost? I’m not talking about those who are what we affectionately call “directionally-challenged.” 🙂 They are those who couldn’t read a map or follow directions to save themselves.
I’m talking about those who are “small.” Not height-wise. They feel small. Unsure of themselves. Insecure to a point. They are those who feel that what they do doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. What they do often seems insignificant to the “bigger” people or things.
Years ago the late Francis Schaeffer wrote a book entitled No Little People, No Little Places. Not only is that a great book title, it is a great thought. The world is filled with people who feel “little.” Tragically, we have often been the ones who have made them feel that way.
Allow me two examples-one social and one Biblical.
* I recently read that when the funeral procession for the late Queen Elizabeth took place, thousands of soldiers were deployed to escort the casket. Insignificant? To the outsider. But not according to one soldier who said, “It was an opportunity to do our last duty for Her Majesty.” One of thousands but what an outlook!
* In the Old Testament, the Levites were commissioned by God to set up and tear down the Tabernacle. Along with that to carry the furniture. What a seeming meaningless job. Set up. Tear down. Carry. Set up. Tear down. Carry. You get the point. Sounds like boredom to me. Sounds insignificant. We know the names of Moses, Joshua, Aaron, and others. Can you name one of the Levites?
Nothing we do-in service to God-is small. Nothing is insignificant. I may be the pastor of the church but in the eyes of God it is no more important than the teacher of children; the nursery worker who takes wonderful care of a child so the parents can worship; the one who does the Power Point; the one who runs the live stream; the one who controls the sound; the one who cleans up after the worship gathering is done; the janitor who cleans for Sunday; or myriads of others.
Why? Because there are no little people. In church. In life. That is one of the reasons I tell our waitress “Thanks for waiting on us today” (and leave a generous tip if they have done a good job). That is why I try to thank the hotel clean up crew, or the one who works in a gas station, or makes sure things are clean in a bathroom. Why? I repeat: because there are no little people.
Do you take the time to recognize and thank those who have seemingly insignificant jobs?
Posted in InTheShadow | 6 Responses »
Tags: Christian Living, Church, Kindness, Mercy, Ministry, Opinion, Reflection, the "Insignificant", Volunteers
Friday, November 17th, 2023
There is a profound difference between thankfulness as a concept and thankfulness as a practice. This is true in so many ways. Take, for example, car companies. Every year they have a grand extravaganza of a car show. Included in this show are “concept cars.” Cars of the future. Cars that are dreams of people. But in most cases, they remain concepts. I’ve seen some wild ideas that are just that…ideas. How much more practical to reveal a car that is a reality.
Think for a moment about gratitude. People who think rightly about God’s provision are thankful, and rightly so. And they say so. Thankers (that is not a word according to spell check) feel something because their gratitude is felt, sometimes deeply. We may stumble on words or how to express our thanks (like when we are put on the spot in a crowd), but we have this overwhelming sense of gratitude for what we have received.
This week I am continuing my series on More Than a Holiday by talking about “we have been blessed to bless others.” There is no better way to say thanks than to pass along that thanks by doing something for others. So, after a look at the 10 lepers in Luke 17 we will be going to James 2 and try to put a “handle” on some practical ways to show gratitude.
Join us in person if you are able. If not, please watch our live stream. We meet at 9:00 and 10:45. I look forward to seeing you or hearing you were watching.
Posted in InTheShadow | 6 Responses »
Tags: Doctrine, Kindness, Ministry, Reflection, Sermon Series, Thanksgiving
Tuesday, October 17th, 2023
Two verses stopped me in my tracks this morning. They are from Proverbs 17:27-28- “Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding. Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.” (ESV)
WOW! Or is that a GULP?
Abraham Lincoln is credited with saying, “It is better to keep one’s mouth shut and thought a fool, than to open it and remove all doubt.” Whether he said it or not is not the issue here. What IS the issue is the truth of that statement. Don’t you think it sound strangely like verse 28 that you just read?
The truth of the statement rises to the top. How many times have you said something and as soon as it passed through the doorway to your mouth you wished you could suck it right back in? But we all know the truth of that. You can’t. What is said is said and what is heard is heard. There is no “Return Unsaid” button. I know I have been guilty way more than I care to admit. I know I have hurt a lot of people over my 71 years-a lot more with my words than I have with a gun or a weapon. Unless, of course, you consider my “rapier wit” and my “fire-breathing tongue” a weapon (I do and so does James in James 3). My words have bitten, hurt, wounded, damaged, and even killed people’s spirits. Oh, how I wish I could have them back.
But I can’t. You can’t either. Words cannot be unsaid. Worse: they cannot be unheard. In this case, though, words that do matter are “I’m sorry” or “Please forgive me.”
Two verses will give us the right perspective as well as close our thoughts today. Psalm 119:101 says, “How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth!” God’s words are words we ought to be feeding ourselves with. What goes in comes out. The other Scripture is one we ought to memorize and then paste it everywhere: “Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips!” (Ps.141:3 ESV)
Be careful of what you “eat” today and what you say.
Posted in InTheShadow | 8 Responses »
Tags: Christian Living, Kindness, Lifestyle, Ministry, Opinion, Reflection, Truth Telling, Words
Thursday, October 12th, 2023
We jokingly talk about, how as a person gets older, forgetting seems to be part of the equation. As we age, our memories aren’t as good. We don’t remember names and faces like we used to. Memorizing sentences, speeches, verses, directions (you name it), just doesn’t go as smoothly as it used to…if at all. I used to never forget a name and a face. Now I’m good enough to remember my own name, and the face staring back at me in the mirror doesn’t look like I remembered. 🙂 I also used to memorize my sermons and then graduated to a very minimal outline. COVID and age changed that!
I’m sure we have all heard of the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier in Arlington National Cemetery. The original bill establishing the Tomb was in 1921 in remembrance of the unknown soldiers who fought in WWI and were buried on the battlefield, often where they fell. In 1956 President Eisenhower signed a bill to pay tribute to soldiers who died from WWII and the Korean War. The tombstone reads, “Here rests in honored glory an American soldier known but to God.” That tomb has remained guarded at all times, in all kinds of weather 24/7/365 since 1937. On April 6, 1948 the Third US Infantry Regiment took over the task of guarding the Tomb.
In Psalm 78, the psalmist is reminding the people of Israel of all God has done for them and that they must not forget. He recounts the goodness of God because, as we all know, it is easy to forget. I realize Thanksgiving is still over a month away, but why not start now remembering all of God’s goodness to you/me over the year?
In fact, why did you/I ever stop?
***************************************************************************************************************************************************************************
Jo, Tami, and I are leaving this morning for a quick trip to Ohio to see our family. We will be returning on Saturday. Prayers for our safety would be appreciated. I will respond to comments as I have time (and Wifi). Have a great weekend.
Posted in InTheShadow | 8 Responses »
Tags: Christian Living, Forgetting, God, Kindness, Lifestyle, Ministry, Opinion, Reflection, Remembering, Scripture look, Story, Thanksgiving
Tuesday, October 10th, 2023
I had a good day yesterday…my birthday. I did absolutely nothing. That’s good and bad. While I worked in the office early and had a staff meeting that lasted all morning due to various reasons, I was unable to go to the Y or for a ride. 🙁 However, I had lunch with Jo and Tami (our adult daughter who is on Fall Break from teaching K kids…thanks Tami), then drove to Terre Haute to pick up my Pathfinder. It had been in the shop since last Thursday. That’s when the fun began.
I did absolutely nothing. Unless you count reading, laughing and eating ice cream nothing. I call it doing what I like to do when I don’t have anything else to do or want to do! 🙂
Honestly? I needed it. After a very busy weekend (I had a wedding rehearsal and ceremony), preaching twice in the morning, and small group I needed a slow day. Plus my schedule in 2023 has been full and hectic. Time away is needed by me and Jo, but such is our life right now and the holidays coming, that it isn’t going to happen. I do have several outlets (biking and the Y), but sometimes one needs more. Sometimes time away is essential. We are hoping 2024 works out for us.
What started me thinking of this (besides my own fatigue and realization)? I read a quote by former MLB player, Andrelton Simmons: “Most people carry scars that others can’t see or understand.” He walked away from baseball in 2020 due to mental health issues.
Several thoughts went through my mind when I read about him. First, we are sometimes very good covering up the real “me.” “Never let ’em see you sweat” is the saying that goes through my head. To let someone see who you really are is often seen as a sign of weakness to admit we even have a struggle. NO. NO it’s not! It is a sign of strength to admit it.
Second, no one dare criticize another who is going through a crisis. I need to constantly remind myself that “there but by the grace of God go I.” That could have been me. He is right. We all have scars. I know I do. And I need to remember to do as Joe Simon once sang about: “Walk a mile in my shoes.” Truthfully, we all need to walk a mile in someone’s moccasins before we dismiss or criticize them.
Jesus empathized with us. Hebrews 5:15 says, “For we do not have a High Priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin.” He knows. He understands. He stands with us. Next to us. Holding us up. Giving us His strength.
Don’t hide. Don’t pretend all is okay. Get help. Be honest. You are not alone.
Posted in InTheShadow | 8 Responses »
Tags: Christian Living, Friendship, God, Jesus, Kindness, Love, Mental Health, Mercy, Ministry, Opinion, Reflection, Story, Suffering, Truth Telling
Wednesday, October 4th, 2023
When I was in college, there was a war going on. In fact, I’m going to date myself with this revelation. The war was in some southeast Asian country. You know…Vietnam.
While in college studying for the ministry, I met some guys who were only at that college for one reason and probably one reason only: they wanted to avoid the war. You see, if you were studying at a Bible college for some type of ministry, you were exempt from military service. I was naive;I didn’t know that. I guess I lived in my own world and didn’t really know much about Vietnam. I knew of the protests and sit-ins. I knew of the songs (“Four Dead in Ohio” by C,S,N,Y is one that sticks out in particular). There was a day or two when I had trouble finding a job for the summer and my uncle took me to a recruiting station (not that he himself would go). Fortunately, the recruiter called my parents to tell them and they talked some sense into me. I wasn’t ready for the military, and wasn’t ready for Vietnam in any way, shape. or form. (Who was?). Anyway, I did find a job-one that reinforced my idea of my life’s vocation. For that, I am forever grateful to God.
Back to the students. Their reason for being at a Bible college had almost nothing to do with the “calling” they sensed on their life to spend it in ministry. And to make matters worse, when they did serve somewhere, their heart and reason were totally out of whack. I’m not judging; I’m stating a fact.
The reason or motive for doing something may be far more important than what is done.
Now, I’m not saying what is done is inconsequential. But when a person serves out of guilt or shame or a sense of obligation, joy disappears. And where there is no joy in whatever one does, the task become mundane. Some people take great pride in what they do. Only that becomes the problem: pride. Not that we shouldn’t care about what we do and work at doing our best. But I’m talking here about having a servant’s heart. No task done because of the joy of service, but perhaps for the accolades or salve a hurting psyche.
Why do you do what you do? If you serve at a soup kitchen, for example. Why? If you help at a homeless shelter. Why? If you support a missionary. Why? If you preach or teach. Why?
Go ahead. Ask yourself that and then give an honest answer. If you deem the motive wrong, take steps to clarify in your own heart, why you do what you do. Then correct it.
Posted in InTheShadow | 10 Responses »
Tags: Christian Living, Generosity, Humility, Kindness, Leadership, Ministry, Motive, Opinion, Questions, Reflection, Service, Truth Telling
Thursday, September 7th, 2023
I was thinking this morning about the seeming coldness of so many people. Even those who are so-called “social justice warriors” are, when you come right down to it, often in it for themselves. They have a social agenda they want to accomplish-whether it be racial, environmental, lifestyle, or even religious. Instead of truly caring for people, many “front” their agenda with fake concern, fake activism. Whether it be for money, fame, a name, or an agenda, they truly don’t care for others.
How different from what the Bible says is true caring. Just a couple of Scriptures show that. Before I do though, let me add this: there is a big-no make that gigantic-difference between sympathy and empathy. Sympathy says, “I’m sorry” but does nothing. It reminds me of that annoying boy in Polar Express who says, “I’m sorry. I really am” but you get the feeling of “not really.” Empathy, on the other hand, truly feels sorrow but then does two things: 1) puts oneself in their place; and 2) does something about it.
Now for the Scripture…and trust me when I say no commentary will be needed. In I Corinthians 12, after speaking about how each member of the body-hand, foot, ear, eye, nose-need each other, Paul concludes with these words: “If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together.” (verse 26 in ESV).
The other Scripture is found in James 2. James discusses favoritism (rich vs poor) in the church assembly by giving favored seats; partiality in morality (overlooking one sin for another sin); and then he hits my point: “If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, and one of you says to them, ‘Go in peace, be warmed and filled,’ without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that? So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.” (Verses 15-17 in ESV)
No racial, environmental, or social agenda. Just a faith agenda: one where feet are put to our faith. Empathy, not just sympathy, is the calling card of a life of faith.
Posted in InTheShadow | 6 Responses »
Tags: Choices, Christian Living, Church, Empathy, Kindness, Lifestyle, Love, Mercy, Ministry, Opinion, Reflection, Scripture look, Sympathy, Truth Telling
Monday, August 28th, 2023
There is an old saying I’m pretty sure we have all heard: “Be sure your sins will find you out.” We read stories-often daily-where this adage plays itself out.
- A church treasurer who decides the church’s money is their personal bank so they begin using the money for themselves and financing ventures for personal gain.
- An accountant who siphons money from a client or clients because of greed.
- A builder who uses cheap materials and takes shortcuts while building.
The sad list goes on. Men and women who are trusted, but end up cheating, lying, and taking advantage of others. All while believing they are not going to get caught.
I Timothy 5:24 says, “The sins of some people are quite evident, going before them to judgment; for others, their sins follow after.” (NASB2020) See that last phrase? My translation: sin will come to roost.
But how about good? You know…there are people who do good but want no recognition. But try as they many, word gets out. I was reminded of that when I continued reading I Timothy 5:25-“Likewise also, deeds that are good are quite evident, and those which are otherwise cannot be concealed.” (NASB2020)
Good should never be done for the purpose of recognition. But sometimes it just can’t help itself. But keep this in mind: it is far better to be known for doing good, than to be known for your “sins.”
***************************************************************************************************
We had a good weekend. I know some of you had prayed for that. We celebrated Janna’s birthday. She had a migraine so we brought her food home after eating supper with Braden. We visited Jo’s sister, who did not know me, and I’m thinking barely knew Jo. We watched Braden play football Friday night. He played a good game and even intercepted a pass. We also had a safe trip with all the driving miles. Thanks for all your prayers.
Posted in InTheShadow | 8 Responses »
Tags: Christian Living, Generosity, Kindness, Ministry, Opinion, Reflection, Right/wrong, Scripture look, Story, Truth Telling
