Love

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February 6

Thursday, February 6th, 2025

“God gained another angel.”

What a horrible, horrible and cold-hearted way to respond to someone who has lost a loved one, especially a child! Those were our sentiments last night.

Let me explain: on Wednesday night I have what I call Wednesday Night Conversations. It’s just a gathering of whoever wants to come and sit around and discuss issues and try to find Biblical answers to those issues. I am using 9 Common Lies Christians Believe by Shane Pruitt as my basis for the conversations. The previous conversation was “God won’t give you more than you can handle.”  Last night’s was “God gained another angel.”

We will often hear that statement used during a funeral, especially by people who are trying to find something to say to parents who lost a child. I know those who say those words are only trying to be helpful and sympathetic, but it simply is not true. And to be brutally honest, the ones who lost that child or that loved one DO NOT want to hear that God wanted their child more than they did. I have stood beside parents whose child passed away or was stillborn or miscarried after month’s inside the mother’s womb and those are not words they want to hear. At those times the only words I found to say was “I’m sorry and if I could take away your pain I would.” More often than not all I could offer was an arm around the shoulder or a shoulder to cry on or a chest to beat on if they wanted to.

Many people have this misguided idea that we become angels when we die. Or a butterfly (or some other tangible expression) to show they are with us. Without getting into too much detail, angels are a whole ‘nother discussion when it comes to who is who and what is what. Hebrews 1:14 tells us angels are servants whose role is to care for people who will inherit salvation. Angels are God’s messengers. They are God’s protectors of His people (Dan. 6:22). They are created to worship God (Is. 6:3). They are God’s warriors (2 Kings 19:35).  As great as angels are, God did not send His Son to die for them. God so loved humans he came as a human to die for humans. (And we don’t get wings)

So…what do you say to someone while standing at a casket or graveside? Sometimes absolutely nothing. Don’t even say, “Call me if you need something.” Most won’t, but one of the ladies made a great suggestion. She lost her husband suddenly and she now visits to show her love and sympathy but then a short while later will call that person and say, “I have been thinking of you. Let’s grab lunch today or tomorrow (set a specific time).” Sometimes the best thing to do is to cry with them or let them cry. Don’t judge. Don’t tell them they will get over it or need to get over it. And please, don’t tell them “God gained another angel.”

 

February 5

Wednesday, February 5th, 2025

Boundaries. Most of us have a love/hate relationship with them.

Take the adolescent. He wants to test the boundaries. The teenager is not fond of them at all. College students think, “Hey! I’m out of the home. I can do what I want!” They want to discard or disregard boundaries. Many young adults and even older adults want nothing to do with them. F-R-E-E-D-O-M!! is their cry (tapping the inner William Wallace there). 🙂

But while boundaries are seen as confining and stifling and downright unnecessary, they actually are or can be a good thing. It used to be stove doors were not insulated against getting burnt.  When they got hot they got HOT. Ask my youngest brother. He was learning to walk when he got too close to the stove. He touched the stove (after being told constantly not to) and felt the burn on his hand. His reaction was to use the other hand to catch himself. Result= trip to the ER to have severely burnt hands wrapped like mittens. Fortunately, God answered prayers and his hands healed with no sign of burns or inability to use his hands. The boundary of “Don’t Touch!” was for a good reason.

But, our natural inclination is to kick against the boundary. Teens don’t like the rules mom and dad have established so their natural desire is to kick against it, or to see how much they can stretch it. Adults do the same thing. We eat what we know we shouldn’t, even though we know it is leading us down a bad road health-wise. That friendship/relationship needs to be checked. It is getting too intimate or too familiar. That financial arrangement is shady. Someone has said, “When you play with fire you either get burnt or smell like smoke.”

Reading Leviticus 14-15 this morning was almost mind-numbing. It was all about skin diseases and bodily discharges and contaminated/mildewed houses. Seriously? Two whole chapters on that? Yes indeed! And a quick look ahead tells me there is more of the same-prohibitions against eating blood and forbidden sexual practices and multiple other prohibitions. Or shall I say boundaries?  I don’t know all the whys and wherefores of these boundaries. I just know that they matter to God because I matter to Him. God is not setting these boundaries to be a killjoy but because He knows what is best and wants me to avoid heartache and sickness and even injury. These boundaries seem like minutia to me/us, but let’s not see them as that. Let’s see them as an act of a loving God who only want the best for his child.

Sort of like a parent with a child.

January 21

Tuesday, January 21st, 2025

“Man, that is one stubborn dude!” 

Have you ever used those words? Have they ever been used about you? Trust me when I say they are not a compliment. Other ways to say that don’t lessen the impact. “Stubborn as a mule.” Aaaah yeah…highly complimentary. Pig-headed. Another highly complimentary phrase.

Of course there are those who consider being stubborn a compliment. I’m not sure why, except they will rationalize it by saying, “I stick by my guns.”  “I have convictions and people know where I stand.” I beg to differ with that assessment. There is a difference between convictions based on truth and stubbornness based on personal opinion or belief.

The Bible is filled with stubborn people. Balaam is one. He is the one who had a donkey talk to him. His full story is found in Numbers 22-24. I’d say it is not a compliment when your donkey knows what is better than you do! There are also the kings who decided to do things their own way. How about Jonah who decided to forego a cruise to Ninevah for parts unknown? But I think one of the most stubborn people in the Bible is Pharaoh. My Bible reading for the Everyday Gospel Devotional has taken me from Exodus 7-12 the past two days. You may be familiar with the plagues that struck Egypt because of Pharaoh’s stubbornness: the Nile turned to blood, frogs, gnats, flies, death of livestock, boils, hail, locusts, darkness, and finally the death of the firstborn. It appears the Israelites were spared these plagues, especially the last one due to the Passover Meal. With blood on the doorpost and down the side of the door, the death angel passed over the household.

Back to Pharaoh. Talk about stubborn! After each plague he would tell Moses to take the people and get out of here but then would change his mind. Even when his advisors told him to let them go (after the plague of locusts) Pharaoh would not listen. The death of his firstborn son finally broke him. At least temporarily. His final act of stupidity…I mean, stubbornness…was chasing the people of Israel into the Red Sea which had parted for them but swallowed Pharaoh and his army.

Being stubborn is not a positive trait. That is especially true when it leads to being bull-headed and taking action which is not good. Standing by/for something that is not true or good. Being stubborn is an act of selfishness. Pharaoh could have saved himself and the people he ruled a lot of heartache and headache if he had not been so stubborn and listened to his advisors. We are often no different. Verse after verse in the Bible speaks of the stubbornness of the people. Deuteronomy. Jeremiah. Isaiah. And others. And we are not exempt either.

Humility. Kindness. Mercy. Love. Grace. They all keep stubbornness in check. It’s time…

January 20

Monday, January 20th, 2025

On one of the old Happy Days TV programs, teenager Richie Cunningham had just been “grounded for life” by his father for misbehavior. As father and son talked about Richie’s misdeed and the punishment, Howard Cunningham asked his son, “Do you know that there is a lesson in this for you?” Richie’s response was priceless: “I figured anything with this much pain had to have a lesson in it somewhere.”  How true, Richie, how true. It is a given that more lessons, more life-changing and life-altering lessons, are learned through difficulties and trials than through ease. In fact, I would venture to say the answer would be zero lessons learned when life is easy.

As I preached on this yesterday I used the illustration of the death of my father-in-law. In 1998 he was being operated on to have a triple by-pass redone. They had done one years before but could not find any evidence of it. During the operation, they were able to do two of the by-passes and when they opened them up they “pinked up” perfectly. But suddenly all the plaque from the old ones let loose and he died on the operating table. I was unprepared for that. Several days later I did his funeral service and held myself together for that. But following that and the meal which followed I went out by myself and bawled like a baby in my van. In 25 years I had never lost someone super close to me and I had done tons of funerals. For the first time I had truly felt the pain of losing someone I loved. I was closer to him than I was my own flesh and blood father. He told me once he was unsure how he felt about his daughter marrying a pastor (more about how he would act around me), but that she chose well and he was proud I was his son-in-law. He could be funny and “earthy” at the same time. He once got a smirk on his face as he began working on my taxes and lit up a cigar. He knew I was allergic to it but the smell was awful. It literally gagged me. He bust out laughing because he knew that would be my reaction and I would leave the office. At the same time, he loved his family and that included me. His love for his two granddaughters was a sight to watch.

I learned a lot through his death. I became “human” as a pastor. I now understood the pain people felt at the loss of a loved one. I no longer participated in a funeral as a detached entity. I try to remember that, even today, soon-to-be 27 years removed from his death. Empathy is a big thing. Take the time to slow down and hear people’s hearts ache. Lend an ear. Better yet, lend a hand or a shoulder. My biggest lesson was not learned in a time of ease, but in the fire.

January 15

Wednesday, January 15th, 2025

I began reading a leadership book by Jon Gordon called The Energy Bus yesterday. I haven’t been able to get very far into it since I was at a doctor’s office waiting and got interrupted. (How rude!) 🙂  So far the gist of the book is Positivity vs Negativity. As I thought about that and then as I listened to the confirmation hearings for Pete Hegseth while I ate my supper, I couldn’t but see that many of those lawmakers needed a good dose of what this book appears to be about. The vitriol, negativity, hypocrisy and downright nastiness was a big turn off to me.

The Bible speaks about doing all things without grumbling and complaining (Phil. 2:14). To use another word: whining. I remember as I was growing up one of my grandfather’s favorite expressions was “Oh, stop your belly-achin'” Even as I type those words I can hear him saying them. (Not to me, of course, because I never complained). 🙂  Seriously though, he was on the money. No one ever made their situation or attitude better-or those around them-by grumbling and complaining.  When I think of someone whining I think of a little child who is not getting his/her way and let’s everyone know. That little whiny voice just grates on my nerves. Well…sadly, many never seem to grow out of that stage of life. Oh, their bodies grow. And yes, their minds grow (least we hope). Their vocabulary grows. But they just don’t seem to grow out of that whininess (and yes, I know that is not a word. Maybe it will be the 2025 Word of the Year!).

This morning in my daily Bible reading I read the following verses. I share them with you because I do believe that our attitude plays a lot into the way we see our day and others. “Taste and see that the Lord is good. Oh, the joys of those who take refuge in Him! Fear the Lord, you his godly people, for those who fear him will have all they need. Even strong young lions sometimes go hungry, but those who trust in the Lord will lack no good thing.” (Psalm 34:8-10). Then from Proverbs 15 I read the following verses: “The tongue of the wise makes knowledge appealing, but the mouth of a fool belches out foolishness.” (v. 2). “A glad heart makes a happy face; a broken heart crushes the spirit.” (v.13). And one more: “Better to have little, with fear for the Lord, than to have great treasure and inner turmoil.” (v.16)

We all have a choice. We  can allow our circumstances to dictate our attitude, or we will allow our attitude to dictate how we see our circumstances. The latter makes more sense for the one who is a follower of Christ because we know the ONE who controls everything!  Make a positive difference today with your attitude. Pull people up not drag them down. You’ll be glad you did and your friends and colleagues will thank you. 

January 1

Wednesday, January 1st, 2025

As I said in yesterday’s post, the chances of anyone reading this today are slim to very slim (maybe none).  In that post I commented how I had preached on Feels Like Home during the months of September and October. Earlier in the year I had read several books which gave me an idea to write something. Those books were Feels Like Home by Lee Eclov; Glad You’re Here by Walker Hayes and Craig Cooper; and Just Show Up by Drew Dyck. I was inspired reading those books and got a hair-brained idea to write something. OVCF, the church I pastor, recited it occasionally early in the year, but when I preached in September and October we did it almost weekly. It is part of our DNA. We have not recited it since the last Sunday in October but will start 2025 off by saying it together. I thought I would share it with you today:

WE’RE GLAD YOU ARE HERE!

If you are happy we want to celebrate with you.

If you are tired and need rest;

If you are hurting and need comfort;

If you have failed, feel guilt and shame and wonder if God still loves you;

If you feel you are at the end of your rope and need a lifeline;

If you think you are too great a sinner and feel hopeless;

If you are here but can’t raise your eyes, head, or hands in worship…

That’s okay. We want this to be a place where you find strength to go on. Let us pray for you, stand beside you and even carry you to God’s throne where you can find new hope.

Maybe you need to read or hear this today. You may never be able to attend OVCF or have a personal conversation with me, but I want you to know there is a God who is always available, always accessible, and will NEVER turn you away…no matter your state. May 2025 be the year of an encounter with Jesus for you. 

November 7

Thursday, November 7th, 2024

Have you ever been “accosted,” yelled at, or screamed at? I’m sure most of would answer Yes to that question. But I have another type of incident in mind.

Have you ever been “accosted,” yelled at, screamed at, or embarrassed by a “person of God” either standing on the street corner or college campus supposedly preaching about Jesus? When I lived in a college town in the 80s-90s, one of the first things I heard about was the so-called preacher (better translated embarrassment, one-who-turned-others-off) at our local university. It was hard for me to believe the story was actually true until I heard several others tell me randomly about it. This so-called evangelist would stand in an outside common area and scream and yell at the students as they walked by. He would throw out the name of Jesus (maybe to give him some validity?), while at the same time ranting and raving about the sin and promiscuity of the college students. He screamed about the boys who had long hair and called the girls some not-so-nice names if they wore shorts or pants. (As if that is a eternal life deal-breaker). When some of the college kids would tell me I could sense my blood boiling, but I could also feel myself turning different shades of green out of sickness and disgust.

What got to me is that I have come to realize that evangelism is more about planting seeds than wielding a sword. I’m sure you have probably heard the old adage which goes something like “more bees are drawn to honey than vinegar.” It is the sweet-smelling and sweet-tasting nectar of the flower which draws the bee or butterfly to it. I seriously doubt the smell of vinegar would do that. I believe people are attracted to hearing the message of Christ by our winsome, caring manner rather than by ranting and raving about sin, and how they are anything but people for dressing or looking a certain way. Ironically, I met this man’s brother several years later and while talking with him, he talked about his embarrassment of his brother. Tragically, the man probably saw it as a badge of honor to “suffer” for the name of Christ.

I know this is a negative-type post and it is not meant to be. My point is to remind us that if we are to share the Gospel with others, let’s do it with grace and “honey” not anger and “vinegar.” Keep in mind also this does not just happen on a college campus. We often give off “airs” of arrogance and judgment in our daily speech.  Let’s be careful in what and how we say it.

October 30

Wednesday, October 30th, 2024

In my daily Bible reading, I began this morning in the book of Romans. Considered Paul’s magnum opus, it is chalk full of truth. All kinds of truth. The purpose of this devotion today is not to give an overview of the whole book, but to give a glimpse into chapter 1.

  • Verses 1-7 has Paul greeting the Roman followers of Christ. He gives some serious doctrinal truth as to who Jesus is.
  • Verses 8-17 has Paul grateful for the Roman followers of Jesus because the love they have for Jesus has spread and others have heard about their love. He gives, perhaps, the most succinct purpose of the Gospel in verses 16-17: “For I am not ashamed of this Good News about Christ. It is the power of God at work, saving everyone who believes-the Jew first and also the Gentile. This Good News tells us how God makes us right in His sight. This is accomplished from start to finish by faith. As the Scriptures say, ‘It is through faith that a righteous person has life.'” (NLT)

But then he lowers the boom. He writes about God’s displeasure with sin-all sin. His approach is multi-pronged:

  1. There are those who disregard God Himself. They deny His existence. I would put them in the “We can’t see Him so He is not real” camp. Paul says they are without excuse. (v.20). He says those who want to think that way are fools. Instead of worshiping a real God, they worship a fake god (images of people, birds, animals and reptiles).
  2. Then comes a very distinct and very confrontational passage: verses 24-27. These are called “clobber verses” because they are used as clubs to confront, judge, condemn and beat people over the head who struggle with SSA. In all honesty, only those who want to justify theirs-or someone else’s actions-can overlook this. BUT…
  3. I am stopped dead in my tracks by verses 28-32. Lest I get arrogant and stand on a self-righteous soapbox, there is a laundry list of sin that condemns us all. We may say, “SSA? Not me!” and feel good about ourselves. But hold on! Look at the list: every kind of wickedness, sin, greed, hate, envy, murder, quarreling, deception, malicious behavior, and gossip. Then Paul writes, “They are backstabbers, haters of God, insolent, proud, and boastful. They invent new ways of sinning, and they disobey their parents.” As each one is leveled, we start hopping around lest His divine foot stomp nail our feet to the floor and expose our sinful heart.

Short recap I know. There is so much more to say. I simply say: investigate on your own. Read this chapter slowly, all the while asking God to speak to your heart. The message will not only be clear; it is one you cannot escape. I think we all need the message of Romans 1, but I especially am grateful for the simple words about Good News in verses 16-17 (see above).

October 29

Tuesday, October 29th, 2024

One of the most used passages in the Bible is found in I Corinthians 13.  You might recognize it as the “Love Chapter.” It is used in weddings. You find it on home decor, bookmarks, even non-religious items/organizations use it. That’s because “love” is the essence of life. But just seeing it as a warm fuzzy saying is missing out on the real strength and power of that passage. Let me explain.

The Corinthian church was a mess, and when I say a mess, I mean a royal mess. Division. Incest. Compromise of truth. Quarreling over spiritual gifts. Fighting over who was more important and whom they followed. All those and more. There was one thing missing in all of that mess:

L. O. V. E.

In truth, love covers a multitude of sins. but there is one sin that blows love apart. Maybe stifles is a better word. That sin is pride and arrogance. The want and desire for power. I was speaking with someone recently expressing a genuine concern for a mutual acquaintance who has gotten into hot water. People are clamoring for a resignation. Not too long ago this person was the belle of the ball, the prince of the crown.

What happened? Pride. Arrogance. The inability to want or accept criticism. Surrounding oneself with “yes” people. A crushing of dissenting voices. Compromise of values took place and in its place was placed initiatives that devalued people. Sadly, unless there is repentance and a sincere apology and an honest attempt to change, great will be the fall. I’m afraid the arrogance and “what I want” will be so strong that proper steps will not happen and a life will be broken to pieces. Blame will be cast that “I was misunderstood” or “They are too pig-headed to see the big picture.” I’m afraid “I told you so” will be uttered, which will cause even more damage. I hate that because there had been much positive action. But like a lot of things, the past will be forgotten for the present. All because this person wouldn’t heed the loving, warning voices of others.

In case you need a refresher: “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful of proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” I Cor. 13:4-7 (NLT) 

Receive it. Learn from it. Give it. Practice it.

October 14

Monday, October 14th, 2024

Not every week, but at least twice a month we open the sermon time with the following saying. I have it put on the screen and TVs so we can all say it together:

WE’RE GLAD YOU ARE HERE!

If you are happy we want to celebrate with you.

If you are tired and need rest;

If you are hurting and need comfort;

If you have failed, feel guilt and shame and wonder if God still loves you;

If you feel you are at the end of your rope and need a lifeline;

If you think you are too great a sinner and feel hopeless;

If you are here but can’t raise your eyes, head, or hands in worship…

That’s okay. We want this to be a place where you find strength to go on. Let us pray for you, stand beside you and even carry you to God’s throne where you can find new hope.

I firmly believe this should be what every church says to every person who walks through their doors on a Sunday morning. In fact, it would be a great thing if the church was known for this every day of the week. People will know we are Christ-followers not by our religious sounding words, our American Idol Sunday morning productions, our promise of prosperity, or fancy buildings. They will know we are Christ-followers by our love. That is exactly what Jesus said in John 13:34-35:  “So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each others. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” (NLT)  Love each other. I see no qualifiers there. I see no “be like this or don’t be like this” in those words. We are to simply love. Nothing more; nothing less.

To love like this is the church being the church. It is also the church being like Jesus. What are you doing to make this happen?