Suffering
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Tuesday, March 11th, 2025
“Be strong and courageous.”
We might say that to a high school or college graduate who is about to step out into a brand new world.
We might say that to someone who has just received a cancer diagnosis or some other disease that ravages the body.
We might say that to someone about to set out on the adventure of a lifetime-hiking, biking, marriage 🙂 , or opening their own shop.
We might say that to someone who is about to take part in a life-changing event.
Or it is something we would read in Joshua 1 where God has commissioned Joshua to lead the people of Israel across the Jordan and into the Promised Land. “Be strong and courageous…Be very strong and courageous…Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:6.7, 9 NLT) Do you think God is telling Joshua not be afraid, to be strong and courageous? 🙂
Courage means different things to different people. I suspect it is determined by the task in front of them. God defines courage as obeying His laws no matter the cost or consequence. He tells Joshua not to stray to the right or left, but to stay on the path. He is to allow it to control his every thought, motive and action. Same with us. It is NEVER easy to follow God’s Word, the laws written down for us to give credence to and follow with all our heart. Anyone who tells you it is easy needs a reality check.
The words to Joshua are good words for us as well. We never know what our day will look like. We can wake up excited to face the day, fully anticipating a day filled with good things only to watch it crumble to pieces shortly after or even before we walk out of the house. So no matter what today brings for you or for me, let’s face it head on with courage and strength that comes from the ONE who told Joshua to “be strong and courageous.” He will give us the strength to face the day and to come out on the other end with courage knowing that strength came from Him.
Posted in InTheShadow | 6 Responses »
Tags: Christian Living, Courage, God's Strength, God's Word, Ministry, Opinion, Perseverance, Reflection, Scripture look, Story, Strength, Suffering, Trials
Tuesday, March 4th, 2025
In a world, in a culture, filled with multiple avenues of going here or doing things, it is often hard to stay focused.  On November 11th of last year, I had knee replacement surgery. The doctor had “bought me” ten more years before surgery was an absolute essential. I was 62 at the time of the first diagnosis and he felt I was too young and too active to do the surgery back then. His belief was that he could by me some time before having the surgery. 3 steroid injections, one hyaluronic acid shot, and 10 years gave me the time I needed. When the last shot lasted one month and I had trouble walking from the hospital doors to my vehicle at times, I went to him and said, “It is time.” He agreed. The surgery was a bit more extensive than he planned due to my bowed leg. He shaved the shin bone, moved some ligaments and tendons around and gave me a new knee all at the same time. Then came the rehab which seemed to go pretty well in some respects but his desire to have the back of my knee to be totally flat on the table is still not a reality. I am down to about 2% but not quite there. I’m still doing rehab at the Y on my own, doing the exercises they prescribed.
I won’t lie: it is sometimes discouraging when I know what I want and where I should be but can’t seem to get there. I mean, I am happy I can walk pain-free for the first time in years. The problem is that I want it all now. And when I say, “Now” I mean “NOW!!!” But what I need to keep in mind is the end goal. He told Tami after my surgery that I will feel absolutely fantastic in 6 months. Hmmm. That leaves me 2 more months of rehab and some discomfort as my “restored” knee adjusts to my lifestyle. I want to rush things along.
But I can’t. I have to take it one day, one exercise, one rehab session at the Y at a time. I have to stay focused on the immediate work with the future goal in mind. Proverbs 4:25-27 says, “Look straight ahead, and fix your eyes on what lies before you. Mark out a straight path for your feet; stay on the safe path. Don’t get sidetracked; keep your feet from following evil.” (NLT) Of course, wanting to be further along is not evil (except when it plays with my mind). 🙂Â
But the warning to stay on the straight path is something we all should heed. Fix your eyes on what lies before you. Don’t look left or right. And most definitely, don’t look behind you.
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Tags: Choices, Christian Living, God's Plan, Lifestyle, Ministry, Miscellaneous, Opinion, Perseverance, Reflection, Scripture look, Story, Suffering, Vision
Thursday, February 6th, 2025
“God gained another angel.”
What a horrible, horrible and cold-hearted way to respond to someone who has lost a loved one, especially a child! Those were our sentiments last night.
Let me explain: on Wednesday night I have what I call Wednesday Night Conversations. It’s just a gathering of whoever wants to come and sit around and discuss issues and try to find Biblical answers to those issues. I am using 9 Common Lies Christians Believe by Shane Pruitt as my basis for the conversations. The previous conversation was “God won’t give you more than you can handle.” Last night’s was “God gained another angel.”
We will often hear that statement used during a funeral, especially by people who are trying to find something to say to parents who lost a child. I know those who say those words are only trying to be helpful and sympathetic, but it simply is not true. And to be brutally honest, the ones who lost that child or that loved one DO NOT want to hear that God wanted their child more than they did. I have stood beside parents whose child passed away or was stillborn or miscarried after month’s inside the mother’s womb and those are not words they want to hear. At those times the only words I found to say was “I’m sorry and if I could take away your pain I would.” More often than not all I could offer was an arm around the shoulder or a shoulder to cry on or a chest to beat on if they wanted to.
Many people have this misguided idea that we become angels when we die. Or a butterfly (or some other tangible expression) to show they are with us. Without getting into too much detail, angels are a whole ‘nother discussion when it comes to who is who and what is what. Hebrews 1:14 tells us angels are servants whose role is to care for people who will inherit salvation. Angels are God’s messengers. They are God’s protectors of His people (Dan. 6:22). They are created to worship God (Is. 6:3). They are God’s warriors (2 Kings 19:35). As great as angels are, God did not send His Son to die for them. God so loved humans he came as a human to die for humans. (And we don’t get wings)
So…what do you say to someone while standing at a casket or graveside? Sometimes absolutely nothing. Don’t even say, “Call me if you need something.” Most won’t, but one of the ladies made a great suggestion. She lost her husband suddenly and she now visits to show her love and sympathy but then a short while later will call that person and say, “I have been thinking of you. Let’s grab lunch today or tomorrow (set a specific time).” Sometimes the best thing to do is to cry with them or let them cry. Don’t judge. Don’t tell them they will get over it or need to get over it. And please, don’t tell them “God gained another angel.”
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Tags: Death, Empathy, Friendship, God, Grace, Kindness, Love, Ministry, Opinion, Reflection, Scripture look, Suffering, Sympathy
Wednesday, December 4th, 2024
Learning Journal #5: WHEN SOMEONE YOU LOVE…
…is dying
…has died
…has a long-term illness
…has dementia or Alzheimer’s
…turns his/her back on their faith
…comes out of the closet sexually
…disowns you or turns against you
…makes bad decisions
As one can imagine, the scenarios would never stop. Those are just the tip of the iceberg.
Funny thing (not ha-ha funny) is that many are either too hard to answer or really have no answer. The hard truth is that sometimes there is no answer, or at least, an easy one. But there are people who think they have the answer. But, generally, they don’t have answers. They have cliches.
- “God is good all the time; all the time God is good.” I cannot even begin to tell you how annoying that is. Let me use one word: REAL. It’s not that it isn’t true. It is to an extent. But you just don’t go spouting that cliche off to a parent whose child announced he/she is leaving the faith or is seeking gender surgery or cancer has been found. Or a man’s wife stares back at him with no recollection of who he is. Yeah…not good words to say carelessly.
- “Praise the Lord anyhow!” No. Curse Him is what we really feel like doing. The last thing God wants for us to do is pretend all is well. He will be there as we continue soothing our heart and working through our pain and seeking His will.
You get my drift. Sometimes we are just better off keeping our words and cliches to ourselves. Sometimes all that other person needs is for someone to just show up. Galatians 6:2 says, “Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ.” (NLT)Â Doesn’t get much plainer than that.
And you don’t even need to use words.
{Note: if you get a chance check out this post I read the other day. It says it much better than I can}
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Tags: Christian Living, Cliches, God's Plan, Hurting, Kindness, Ministry, Opinion, Reflection, Scripture look, Story, Suffering, Sympathy, Truth Telling
Wednesday, November 27th, 2024
This will be my last Learning Journal entry for this week. I’m going to do tomorrow what we all should be doing: laying aside our devices, our social media fetish, and our “all things tech” obsession and spend time with family and friends. I have some more Learning Journal entries written and will just carry them over to next week. Here is Learning Journal entry #3: SLOW AND STEADY.
One week before my surgery, one of the teenage girls in the church family had hip surgery. Some of it was from birth (her hip socket was not round and each time she ran or rotated that hip friction and erosion happened), and some of it was from a TKD opponent in class who did what he was not supposed to do-grab a kick and twist her. Anyway, she has hip surgery and one week later mine followed.
She has a blog she writes on Substack (carefully monitored by her parents…yay for them!) and in one of her posts she talked about slow and steady. I commented that slow and steady is most definitely the road back to health. I know for myself I have experienced some frustration after exercising religiously and therapy that it is not progressing as quickly as I would like.
Slow and steady. These exercises hurt. Slow and steady. I don’t want to use the walker. Slow and steady. Get me that cane! Slow and steady. I’d sure like to go to the office. Slow and steady. I want to drive. Slow and steady. I want to go to the Y. Slow and steady.
Sort of reminds me of the Christian walk. When a person come to Christ, no one should expect a spiritual giant in a week. Least of all, that person himself/herself. And yet, we sometimes get frustrated because we aren’t moving as fast we we want or think we should. Slow and steady are the words to keep in mind. Plus…give yourself some grace!! 🙂
Another factor to keep in mind is we will not always be on an upward trajectory. Ups and downs. Plateaus. Spurts and stops are all a part of the growth process. I’m reminded of the words of Colossians 2:6-7: “And now, just as you accepted Christ as Lord…Let your roots grow down into Him, and let your lives be built on Him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness.” (NLT) These verses are a reminder that life in Christ is a slow growth process. Roots don’t grow deep overnight.
Sort of like slow and steady.
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Tags: Growth, Lifestyle, Opinion, Perseverance, Reflection, Scripture look, Slow and Steady, Story, Suffering, Surrender, Trials
Tuesday, November 26th, 2024
I am continuing my Learning Journal with lessons I learned and am learning. The first installment was yesterday. You can check that out here. This is Learning Journal #2.
Have you ever noticed how some things never move as quickly as you want them to? Then again, sometimes time flies. The old adage “Time flies when you are having fun” might apply to life from time to time but not so much healing.
I’ve been in a holding/waiting period for almost 2 weeks (Nov. 11th surgery). Slowly I’ve watched the days go by as I’ve been very limited as to what I can do. Therapy. Ice. Doze off. Ice. Read. Doze off. Burning pain at time that would stop a horse (I’m guessing). I’m sitting in the surgeon’s waiting room (Friday, the 22nd) as I write this, now waiting for his PA to come in.
Waiting seems to be a staple in our lives. I don’t know about you, but I have very little patience for waiting in line, especially at WalMart or Kroger when they have 10 registers but only one open. I’m not one to jump on the bandwagon of self-checkout.
But in all seriousness, waiting is lauded in the Bible as a good thing. One of the most well-known, most well-loved, and most memorized Scripture is Isaiah 40:28-31. Verse 31 says, “But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” (NLT) The word for “trust” is the word “wait.” We might use the word “rely on” or “lean on.”
Truthfully, God doesn’t act at human speed. Sometimes He is much slower; sometimes He is much faster. The hardest thing is to wait. You have probably heard the old adage I’m sure: “God is seldom early, but He’s never late.” So…wait, loved one. Wait.
{Note: As you can see I wrote this last week. Things have changed since that day. My therapy is moving ahead and I have more freedom. Thanks for your prayers}.
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Tags: Christian Living, God's Plan, Opinion, Patience, Reflection, Scripture look, Story, Suffering, Waiting
Tuesday, October 15th, 2024
While I work out at the Y sometimes I will find familiar tunes that are in my Spotify Playlist. But sometimes I find what looks like an intriguing listen. Since I am on their WiFi I can listen without downloading. Sometimes it takes one or two songs before I am finding something else. One of those rare finds recently is a group called Lionheart. As I listened to them yesterday, I heard again a song called Flight 19. Intrigued, I decided to investigate what that is and why someone would write a song about it. Here is a brief history:
Flight 19 was the designation of a group of five General Motors TBM Avenger torpedo bombers that disappeared over the Bermuda Triangle on December 5, 1945, after losing contact during a United States Navy overwater navigation training flight from Naval Air Station Fort Lauderdale, Florida. All 14 naval aviators on the flight were lost, as were all 13 crew members of a Martin PBM Mariner flying boat that subsequently launched from Naval Air Station Banana River to search for Flight 19.
A report by Navy investigators concluded that flight leader Lt. Charles C. Taylor mistook small islands offshore for the Florida Keys after his compasses stopped working, resulting in the flight heading over open sea and away from land. The report was later amended by the Navy to read “cause unknown” to avoid blaming Taylor for the loss of five aircraft and 14 men. The report attributed the loss of the PBM search aircraft to an explosion in mid-air while searching for the flight. (Information found on several sites. This is from Wikipedia).
Hmmm. Interesting: the Bermuda Triangle. I was glad to see Lt. Taylor was cleared of any wrongdoing. What has never been solved has been what happened to Flight 19. The song by Lionheart has this chorus: “No one’s seen Flight 19/Lost at sea/Wrapped in a shroud of mystery.” It repeats that several times throughout the song.
It got me thinking. Is that not sometimes how the Christian faith is? There are times we know for sure beyond a shadow of doubt the who, what, where, when, and why. But how many times do we not know the WHY? of things? How many times have you or someone you know used that word when questioning God’s work in yours or someone’s life you know? And very often that why question goes unanswered. It remains a mystery. Sort of like what happened to Flight 19. To this day it still has never been found.
There are times we are not to know God’s reasoning. There are times we will never know God’s reasoning. No matter how many times we hear the phrase, “Sometimes you won’t know until you get beyond the issue and look back.” While that may be true in some cases, it is not in all. I tire of asking Why. What I have tried to do (and not always succeeding) is to remember God is God and I am not. He is not obligated to tell me of all the intricacies of His work and will. What He does want me to do is trust Him. Sherlock Holmes I am not. I am, however, a child of His whom He loves very much. He asks me to trust Him.
{And if you get a chance, check out Flight 19 by Lionheart. In fact, I like their whole album.}
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Tags: Choices, Christian Living, Faith/Trust, God's Plan, Historical event, Lifestyle, Opinion, Reflection, Story, Suffering, Trials
Wednesday, September 18th, 2024
I read the following story recently. I thought I would share it with you:
In 1942 Davis Ellis was hired as educational director for Allstate Insurance Company. His job was to recruit and train female insurance agents during WWII. In 1950 Ellis’ daughter got sick with hepatitis. One morning as Dave headed out the door for work, the family physician called to let the family know that he was very concerned about JoAnn and that he was calling in a specialist, a Dr. Keyser. That evening when Ellis returned home, his wife, Helen, rushed to him and threw her arms around him. “Dave,” she said, “the specialist has examined JoAnn and Dr. Cummings tells me that JoAnn in in good hands with Dr. Keyser.”
JoAnn recovered, and later that year, Ellis was part of a group working into the night to plan Allstate’s ad program for the coming year. Dave Ellis remembered how his anxiety eased when hearing those words: in good hands. He suggested using it as a slogan, along with an illustration of a pair of hands cradling a car. “You’re in good hands” has been Allstate’s slogan ever since. (found in Saved by Nancy Guthrie-p.127)
Just so you know, this is not a commercial for Allstate. My insurance company has been a “Good Neighbor” for close to 50 years. 🙂
But here is my thought I’d like you to ponder as well: Many people deem trouble and suffering as a bad thing. To be transparent, I’ve done my fair share of complaining, whining, and even crying when situations seem to keep coming and want to overwhelm me. But one thing I need to, no, want to keep in mind is that every moment, every event, is either a learning moment or a teaching moment. I can use it to learn something or use it to teach something. Mr. Ellis used the moment with his daughter to learn something and then, in turn, use it to teach/share into a positive lesson.
In I Corinthians 10 the Apostle Paul is writing about Israel’s history in the wilderness and says these words: “These are things that happened as a warning to us.” (v.6). In verse 11 he says, “These things happened to them as examples for us. They were written down to warn us…”
Waste nothing. Learn from it. Teach it.
{Note: All Scripture from New Living Translation}
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Tags: Christian Living, God's Plan, Leadership, Ministry, Opinion, Perseverance, Reflection, Scripture look, Story, Suffering, Trials
Thursday, August 29th, 2024
One word says it all. One word can turn a person’s world upside down. That word? BETRAYAL.
I’m not sure there is a much more crueler word than that one. It congers up feelings of hatred, of anger, of spoken and unspoken words. It makes our blood boil. It makes us shiver.
That word came to my mind this morning as I read a passage of Scripture. Contrary to what you may be expecting, it was not about Judas’ betrayal of Jesus. In all honesty, I’m guessing most of us probably think of that when the word betrayal is mentioned.
Actually this passage is from Psalm 55. David wrote it. There were multiple times David was betrayed so I am unsure who this is speaking of, but it is still a sharp jab to David’s side. Here is the Scripture: “It is not an enemy who taunts me-I could bear that. It is not my foes who so arrogantly insult me-I could have hidden from them. Instead, it is you-my equal, my companion and close friend. What good fellowship we once enjoyed as we walked together to the house of God.” (Verses 12-14 NLT)
What do you think? You surely sense his pain. I do. Perhaps the ultimate betrayal is from a friend. We’re not talking about the man without a country who betrays his country. We are talking about a friend who betrays a friend. David describes him as “my equal, my companion and close friend.” OUCH!
How did David survive the betrayal? Not by lashing out. Not by revenge. Not my getting even. Here is his secret:“But I will call on God, and the Lord will rescue me. Morning, noon, and night I cry out in my distress, and the Lord hears my voice.” (55:16-17 NLT)
The next time you are betrayed (which I hope never happens) it’s not enough to say, “I should have chosen a better friend.” You could not have known. Rather, take your distress, your broken heart to God. You can’t change the actions or words of your former friend, but you can take charge of your reaction. Here’s some further advice from David: “I trust in God, so why should I be afraid? What can mere mortals do to me?” (Psalm 56:11 NLT)
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Tags: Betrayal, Christian Living, Forgiveness, Friendship, Lifestyle, Opinion, Reflection, Revenge, Scripture look, Story, Suffering
Tuesday, July 16th, 2024
One last devotion…(I think). 🙂
The past week or so of devotions here at “Shadow” I have been writing and telling you about a book that had a profound impact on me-Out of the Blue by Greg Murtha. (Those dates are July 9, 10, 11, and 15). At the age of 46, Greg, a healthy runner and athlete, go-to leader, husband and father, was stricken with Agressive Stage III Colon Cancer. He endured 95 chemo treatments over 5 years, but on June 22, 2017 he “moved to the front of the line” to use his words. He completed his book on June 15th in room 8637 of Vanderbilt University Medical Center’s CCU.
As I finished reading his book for the second time (the first I barely remember), I was overwhelmed with emotion. I shed some tears for a life well-lived, but also because it struck close to home. Not me. I just lost a friend to cancer and another has brain cancer. This book chronicling his thoughts and actions of the last 5 years of his life deeply and profoundly impacted me and caused me to stop and evaluate my own life.
I once read that Joni, the well-known Christ-follower who has been a quadriplegic for over 50 years, was once asked if she would change anything. She said, “No. I thank God for the accident and my wheelchair.” (edited by me). Several times Greg said virtually the same thing, i.e. he was thankful for the cancer that totally changed his life. It slowed him down. It woke him to the needs of others. It brought him to the point of listening to God. He would go for treatment, into a store, into a room and notice people most would miss-people who needed a hug, or who were hurting, had tears in their eyes, or simply needed a word of encouragement, or a prayer. And he was not ashamed to offer that.
He wrote the following:
“I’m learning that being present in the moment is what is important. Being the church wherever I am-that’s what matters. Listening to the prompting of the Holy Spirit is paramount to living a life of adventure.” (p. 160)
I’ll close by simply saying that I want that. Healthy or not I want to be present in the moment. I want to be the church, a representative of Christ, where I am and to whomever I come across. Will you join me?
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Tags: Choices, Christian Living, Death, God's Plan, Grace, Humility, Kindness, Life, Lifestyle, Love, Mercy, Ministry, Opinion, Reflection, Story, Suffering, Surrender