January 7

Written by Bill Grandi on January 7th, 2021

Who am I meant to be? A slight variation of that is the question asked by millions of people since the beginning of time: who am I? I think every teenager asks that question. In all honesty, it isn’t a question just for teens. I know adults-in their 20s, 30s, 40s- who still wonder what they are here for. I’m one of them.  I should say I used to be.

My mother once told for as long as she can remember I talked about being a pastor. Other than the unrealistic dream of being a professional baseball or basketball player, I never dreamed of being a fireman or policeman or any of the other “hero” vocations. Except for a 2-year period (6th-7th grade) where I spread my wings verbally (you can draw your own conclusions), I always had a heart for God. I stood out like a sore thumb in high school when I wouldn’t fight, riot or even go out Friday night to get drunk so I could throw up and drink some more. How stupid is that? But even though my heart leaned toward, and even though I did become a pastor, there have been times I’ve questioned that. When I got fired or dismissed. When the church failed to grow. When my own heart grew cold and sometimes bitter. When I stood and compared myself to others. It was tough but what brought me back was knowing what I was created for. Two things: 1) I was made by God to have a fully restored relationship with Him; and 2) I was made to be transformed by Him.  It’s the icing on the cake.  It’s the cherry on top of the ice cream.  Everything else is, well, superfluous.

“Father, I was created by You to be Yours and to be transformed by You. Please do Your work in me so I will know my purpose.”


8 Comments so far ↓

  1. Thank you, Bill, for being vulnerable in sharing your heart. Thanks for being real. As of late, I’m asking the same question. I prayed your prayer.

    • Bill Grandi says:

      Thanks Diane. Sometimes I tend to be too transparent. But I’m glad mine helped you this morning.

  2. Ryan S. says:

    I think all who read will pray your prayer… Thanks for your transparency.

  3. Amen, Bill! We need to follow God’s calling in order to become the best version of ourselves.

  4. Ed says:

    Not to shabby I’d have to say :~)

    I hated that my dreams were crushed by my lack of experience (and determination). But I don’t regret where i am now.

    • Bill Grandi says:

      We all have dreams that don’t pan out Ed. It is picking back up that it is important.