“Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.” Proverbs 17:9 (ESV)
While many are quick to condemn lying, stealing, adultery, idolatry, homosexuality-you know…the so-called “big sins”- a pass is often given to another devastating and life-ruining sin: GOSSIP. I’m thinking more lives have been ruined by gossip than possibly all the others combined.
No, I’m not downgrading the severity of the so-called “big sins” in relation to a soul, but gossip is carried on regularly with seemingly no guilt.
The proverb above can be looked at two ways. One, it could involve me and another person. If someone does something to me, I could either choose to love and forgive, or spread to others what has been done. That other person and I will likely never again be close friends (if friends at all).
Or two, I could be a witness to someone being hurt and spread the event with my tainted opinion. Again, instead of being one who helps others reconcile, I become the one who splits them.
James tells us the tongue is “a restless evil, full of deadly poison.” (James 3:8) We can talk about swearing and cursing, but gossip may be the cruelest of all.
Go by this: if you don’t have anything good to say, don’t say anything at all. Keep the gossip to yourself.
I equate gossip to generated drama. I tend to avoid conversations that include it. Some I guess find it entertaining, but at whose expense? I don’t have a issue attempting to find a solution to a relational squabble, but if the intent is simply ro air someone else’s laundry… Keep it on your own clothes line, or better yet, don’t steal their laundry to begin with.
You made me chuckle with your laundry and clothes line comment. I would just as soon avoid it.
Great advice, Pastor Bill. Gossip has wreaked untold havoc and caused so much hurt and devastation. I pray often for God to set a guard at the gate of my lips, & He is so faithful to do that & has stopped many a word from coming across them. May He ever keep us close enough to Him to hear His still small voice warning us when we are about to say something wrong. He is ever faithful.
Every time I read those words in Psalms I remember to ask for a door and gate to be put on my lips. That is great advice Cheryl! I pray I hear only His voice and the Holy Spirit stops me from speaking and saying untrue things. Even true things which could hurt need to be stopped.
It’s no wonder that this is mentioned in the Bible. The church itself can, and does, fall into gossip. I’ve seen it myself. (Plus I was guilty of indulging in it online… which is bad!)
Tragically it is in the church Ed. Shouldn’t be but it is. That goes along with the church being made up of humans. 🙂