November 28

Written by Bill Grandi on November 28th, 2023

I found myself saying quite a few times this past month during my sermons that “we have been blessed to bless others.” (Sure is different than that clap-trap of the health/wealth people who bless themselves with planes, mansions, cars, etc). What has been given to us in the way of material blessings was never intended on being kept to ourselves or to enrich our lives. Being selfish is never a fun thing to see or to experience.

The same can also be said about something else: being hurt. When we are hurt-either by God (so we think) or by someone else-one of several reactions takes place: 1) we scream and shout in anger; 2) we “hole up” or withdraw within ourselves. We become almost numb to the world; or 3) we use that pain to help others. The first two are often out go-to reactions. “This pain is so deep the only person to blame is God. If not, then you, the one who caused it.” Or as I’ve mentioned, to withdraw in numbness, wondering if this pain will ever go away.

The third option is the best and preferred reaction. Instead of wallowing in anger and self-pity or misery, use this experience to help someone else. There is a saying” “Hurting people hurt people” and sadly, that is true. Childhood trauma acted out later is a perfect example of that. But let’s flip flop that:

Hurting people help people

Hurting people can turn their hurt and agony and pain and distress into empathy for others. Instead of turning inward and focusing inwardly, turn that pain outward and let your hurt minister/help someone else. Allow your life lessons-and if you are a follower of Jesus the lessons the Holy Spirit is teaching you through the Word and others-to make your heart sensitive to other hurting people.

I’ve noticed one HUGE gain from that: focusing on others-helping others-helps ease your own pain and aids in healing. If nothing else, the joy you feel from helping someone else is worth the effort. Don’t waste pain. Use pain to see another through different eyes.

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On Sunday morning, Jo’s sister went to be with Jesus. She has been in a nursing facility with diabetes, kidney dialysis, and dementia which went into full bore Alzheimer’s. It was a blessing in more ways than one. We leave this morning for Sandusky, OH to meet tomorrow with the nursing home and the funeral home (all arrangements were made a couple of years ago) and the graveside committal is Thursday morning. Following the service we plan to head to Columbus, OH to see our daughter and grandson. We will be back home Friday. You can pray for safe travels and you can pray for a smooth transition for all Jo needs to take care of.  I am not sure about posting any devotion over the next few days. It will depend on my availability. Thanks.

 

12 Comments so far ↓

  1. Diane Ronzino says:

    Oh, Bill….I’m so sorry for your and Jo’s loss. I know the sorrow. Within the past five weeks, I lost my 21-year-old grandson from a mountain bike accident and my brother, who died suddenly. Please give Jo my sincere sympathy. Safe traveling. May Holy Spirit truly be your comfort.

    • Bill Grandi says:

      It is good to hear from you Diane. I’m sorry to hear of your loss as well. We are really okay. The last time we saw her (about a month or so ago) she was not there. She is safe in the arms of Jesus now and we know for sure the Holy Spirit has given us the comfort of that truth. Thanks again.

  2. You are both in my prayers, Bill. God bless you and keep you safe as you travel.
    Blessings!

  3. Ryan S. says:

    We can’t control the actions or the circumstances that impact us… We can decide how we want to respond to those actions and circumstances.
    Turning difficult situations into opportunities to help others can be a struggle to begin with. I often just want to wallow in my own self-pity. The faster I am able to rebound and change that to something productive, the better I feel.

    –Give Jo a hug for me… let’s plan to get together for lunch after you all return.

    • Bill Grandi says:

      I know for some it is harder because of personality. In the long run it will be worth the trouble. I will be glad to give her a hug and getting together sounds good

  4. gail says:

    Prayers for both the Grandi family and the Ronzino family. Going through a hurtful experience is never easy, but it is always a learning opportunity. God has a way of taking that hurt, and showing you how grace works. Learning to meditate on God’s word, and not just reading it, becomes clear to you when you are asking God to show you and teach you. We can’t always stand in each other shoes, or truly understand the hurts of others, if we have never been through that hurt. However, the common thread of hurting can unite us to one another, we can be great listeners, we can show one another Bible verses that help us. We can explain the power of the Holy Spirit in teaching us how to pray through a hurtful situation. We can pray for one another. Most importantly being present for the person to lean on, and just keep them looking towards God for the answers only He can provide. Not letting them run from God, when He is only way to heal them.

    • Bill Grandi says:

      Fantastic comment Gail! It’s beena long day so I hope people will read your comment and see the wisdom in it without me making a long response. 😉

  5. Linda Stoll says:

    “we have been blessed to bless others.”

    amen. no truer words have been spoken. what a joy to share all that Christ has given us to overflowing.

  6. Cheryl says:

    Kevin, Zach, and I send our deepest sympathy to you and Jo in the loss of her sister. I pray that you feel the presence of the Holy Spirit in every moment of grief.

    • Bill Grandi says:

      Thank you Cheryl and please thank Kevin and Zach for their thoughts and prayers as well.